Where does my real power come from? (Reading 2.8)

     Knowing where power comes from helps us to build our own power and increase our capacity to take action.  For some, power comes from personal attributes or traits, and for others power comes from structural sources or situational requirements.  Too many times we overemphasize the importance of people and their characteristics and underemphasize the importance of situational factors.  For example, even when we know that the behavior we observe is strongly affected by situational factors, we still make evaluations about others based on that behavior.  Certain personal characteristics of people are associated with being powerful, some of which result from the experience of being in power.  Ambition, self confidence, extroversion, socially adept, and articulation are just a few personal characteristics that give one power.  For me, self confidence is a personal trait that gives me power.  Self confidence is directly associated with and connected to an individual's social network, the activities they participate in, and what they hear about themselves from others.  Self confidence, ambition, and competence are all personal traits that helped me finish a marathon, helped me with public speaking, helped me to back to school for my degree.  These personal traits gave me the power to successful and thrive.  Without these traits, I would not have had the power to accomplish those things. 

Women Don't Ask (Reading 4.1)

     Even though I found this reading quite interesting and informative, I also felt insulted as a woman for the reason why women are generally paid lower salaries than men.  I do find it surprising that most women just do not ask for things or negotiated terms.  This is something I've never thought about or even considered in my everyday life.  Now that I've read about these studies and statistics, I am going to not just assume things in the future and try to apply my newly learned negotiation skills.  I am startled to know that on average men make 7.6% more money than women.  However it makes me very angry that they use the excuse for not paying women more because women simply didn't ask for it.  Although I do believe these findings, I feel there is no excuse for any employer to pay a man more than a women of equal quality of work just because he asked for it!  Most employers do evaluations annually and would be able to see who is getting paid more and why.  It seems only ethical to me for an employer to justify these findings at this time.  To just say, I'll give the men and women both a 3% raise still is not fair.  To turn it around to say that women get paid less is because they didn't ask for it is a slap in the face.  This is no different than you seeing someone unknowingly drop money on the ground.  An ethical person that witnessed it would pick up the money and give it to the person that dropped it.  To say, I kept the money because that person didn't ask for it is not moral and it's very selfish.  This reading and these findings are in some way blaming women like they did something wrong.  I also find it shocking that mostly women conducted these studies and experiments and just accepted the results that "oh women don't ask" and never even go on to write about how this is wrong on the employer's part. Again, this is women accept what has happened or what they're told... just like accepting a job no matter what the pay is.  Just because men use negotiation more does not make them smarter or more qualified.  In fact, not negotiating could possibly mean women are better at working with what they have and making it work.  I don't see how not asking for things is necessarily a problem...???  When I worked for the telephone company for 21 years, my pay was never up for negotiation.  They were quite strict about what we were paid, so I only assumed I could never negotiate it.  It never occurred to me to even ask.  I just accepted my 1.5% annual raise with a smile.  Now that I've read this article, it makes me wonder if my male peers were getting paid more than me.  It now makes me angry to think back knowing after 250 evaluations (because we were evaluated monthly and I worked there for 21 years (12 X 21 = 252)), I never once asked for an increase in pay.  This reading has opened my eyes to such things.  As a woman, maybe I need to be more assertive when it comes to my own professional rewards.  I will keep this in mind with my upcoming graduation and career search. 

Three Schools of Bargaining Ethics

     After reading the Three Schools of Bargaining Ethics, I believe my fit is more aligned with a "pragmatic idealist" when it comes to bargaining ethics.  I found myself fall somewhere between being a pragmatist and an idealist, or maybe a combination of both.  I certainly don't consider myself or ever see myself executing a negotiation as it were a "poker game".  In the business world, I find it quite dishonest to treat negotiations as a game and trying to bluff dealings.  I do not feel this is a trustworthy tactic and feel this could hurt my credibility and reflect poorly on me.  These types of negotiations would keep me from sleeping soundly at night.  Anytime you need to "bluff" to win a negotiation, it is not even worth negotiating anymore.  I feel I have more integrity and self worth than that.  Members of Poker School are selfish and are only worried with their own personal gain.  They put me to mind of vultures or predators.  Call me naïve, but I much rather have respect and dignity. 
     Members of Idealist School say bargaining is a part of social life, and it is wrong to lie or mislead in social encounters such as negotiations.  However, Idealists are guided by ideals and even though they don't blatantly lie, they will not volunteer information that will weaken their negotiation.  An idealist may decline to answer questions but prefer to be candid and honest even if it means giving up  their strategic advantage when bargaining.  Idealists follow ethical rules possibly through religion or philosophy. 
     Members of Pragmatist School are more practical and a matter-of-fact.  Pragmatists are concerned with negative effects of deception on relationships.  Not only do they feel lying is wrong, but it costs them more in the long run than they gain in the short run.  Pragmatists are more concerned with preserving working relationships and protecting their reputation.  However, a pragmatist will lie a bit more often than an idealist will.  Pragmatists are looser within the truth and use "blocking techniques" to avoid answering certain questions.  Blocking techniques are tactics used to avoid answering questions that threaten to expose a weak bargaining position where an idealist would refuse to answer the question and try to change the subject. 
     Although some may feel that being honest is a weakness when negotiating, I feel what gives me an advantage is that I'm also blatant, firm, and straight-forward.  Even though I have the characteristics of being both pragmatic and idealistic, my assertiveness, honesty, and reputation are far more important strengths. 

Live8 Negotiation via email

The LIVE8 negotiation between my partner and myself was through email.  During most of the negotiation, the cofounder of Live8 was not interested in helping the cause at all.  There was even a point it got worse and he was becoming even more determined not to help us.  He is not favorable of "western" countries, and I had to convince him that www.live8live.com would be accepting donations and support from all over the world, not just western countries.  After a lot of persistence, I finally convinced him to lease his domain name of Live8.org if I present the leaders of the G8 countries information about his cause as well and how to distribute aid to other countries.  We finally agreed on $3,000 price to lease the domain name Live8.org on a temporary basis, because after the Live8 musical event, he is going to return to using that site for his initial cause. 

Checklist Reading 1.4

A.  About Me

• Overall goal was to get use of domain Live8.org whether I lease it or purchase it
• Time is a huge issue since it's only two weeks before the music event
• Resistance point is $1,000,000

B.  About the Other Side

• Co-founder of Live8 (art gallery) is a philanthropist
• Very proud and passionate about Live8
• Does not want to sell domain
• Does not like Westerners & does not believe in our cause

C.  The Situation

•  Need to convince other side to release the use of Live8 domain before discussing money
•  Other side does not trust Westerners, therefore does not trust me

D.  The Relationship between the Parties

• Gained trust by offering to help other side's cause as well
• Both sides were more interested in helping others than negotiating money
• Presenting other side's cause to G8 leaders
• Made a deal of $3,000 per month lease of domain (put in writing)